Anxious Child

It’s completely normal for children to feel nervous or anxious about visiting the dentist. The mere mention of the word “dentist” can bring up a range of emotions, memories, and experiences. For some, these memories are positive, while for others, they may be negative. Whatever your past experience may have been, when addressing your child's fear or phobia, it’s important to approach it with a positive mindset.

Bringing any negative emotions or past experiences into your child's dental visit can make their fear more difficult to manage. If you’re reading this, it means you care deeply about your child’s experience and want to support them in every way possible. The key to helping your child is to stay positive, even in challenging situations.

For younger children, especially those under five, it can be tough to tell whether their behavior stems from fear or simple defiance. Some children may not yet have the maturity to handle dental care and may act out when stressed. It’s important to recognize your child’s emotional maturity and set realistic expectations for how they might respond to stress.

As parents, our own anxieties about dental visits can unknowingly increase our child’s stress level before we even step into the office. Children are highly intuitive and can pick up on our emotions, which may influence their experience.

At the end of the day, we all want our children to have a positive experience at the dentist. However, it’s important to remember that kids can be unpredictable. No amount of preparation can always ensure a calm visit if a child is determined not to cooperate. The most important thing to remember is this: whether your child has a fear or phobia, it’s our role to guide them through it with your support. As a parent, you set the tone by helping your child understand that we are here to help, and for us to do so, they must cooperate.

It’s never our job to force treatment on a child, but we are here to coach them through the process if they are willing. Ultimately, our goal is to help your child understand the importance of good oral health and give them a solid foundation to build on for the future. For more tips on supporting your child, check out our TIPS for a Smooth Visit.

Always maintain a positive attitude and frame dental health discussions in an encouraging way with your child. While dentistry can sometimes feel stressful, a positive outlook can help redirect your child’s emotions toward the benefits of visiting the dentist. It’s easy to forget that regular check-ups and early diagnosis help prevent discomfort and pain down the road.

Avoid using words like "hurt," "shot," "needle," or "pain." These words can trigger negative emotions and increase anxiety, making it harder for your child to trust the dentist. Children do not have the same coping skills as adults, so creating a positive environment is key to helping them feel safe and comfortable. As pediatric dentists, we focus on fostering an atmosphere where your child feels supported and at ease. The language you use at home can greatly influence how your child perceives the dentist. To help with this, you can visit our website to download our "Kid Talk: Pediatric Dentistry Vocabulary Sheet" for tips on how we describe instruments and procedures to children.

Role Play: For younger children, role-playing is a great way to reduce fear and introduce them to the dental experience. A week before the appointment, simulate the dental visit by using a chair as the dental chair and acting out each step of the process. You can even use a battery-operated toothbrush to mimic the hygienist's tools. Practicing a few days in advance will help familiarize your child with what to expect, which can reduce resistance. Consistency in these practice sessions is key to easing anxiety.

Pick a Parent: Children’s behavior can vary depending on which parent accompanies them to the appointment. In stressful situations, having both parents present may increase anxiety, as children might interpret it as a sign of something being wrong. We encourage one parent to accompany their child during treatment. On occasion, two parents may be allowed, but this decision is made by the doctor. It’s essential for the child to listen to the doctor, and having too many people in the room can make it harder for them to focus.

Trust the Team: Our dental team is here to help you support your child in receiving dental care in a safe and enjoyable way. With years of experience and specialized training, we have successfully guided thousands of children through their dental visits. While some dental procedures can be uncomfortable, it’s our job to help your child handle those moments with care and compassion. We employ strategies designed to ease anxiety and create a positive experience, even if your child is initially resistant. Should treatment be necessary for an uncooperative child, we will ensure it is done gently and with your consent.

If you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to contact our office. We are here to support both you and your child every step of the way. Thank you for trusting us with your child’s oral health!

For children with significant fears or phobias, or those exhibiting defiant behavior, alternative treatment options may be necessary to ensure that dental care is completed safely and without trauma. Understanding why your child is unable to handle treatment using traditional methods is crucial. By identifying the underlying reasons, we can make more informed decisions about which techniques will be most effective. Below, we outline recommendations based on age and temperament. Please refer to the Sedation section on our website for more details about the sedation options we offer.

3 and Under Children under the age of 3 are often either defiant (not willing to cooperate) or unable to remain still long enough for comprehensive dental work. At this age, their attention span is limited, and their patience is still developing. This behavior is typical and age-appropriate. Most children under 3 lack the psychological maturity to undergo extensive dental procedures. Due to their unpredictability, oral sedation is often ineffective, especially for longer treatments that require cooperation. In many cases, these young patients will refuse the sedative or spit it out, and we cannot administer additional doses. In these situations, we may recommend IV sedation or treatment in the operating room.

4-7 Years Old Children between 4 and 7 years old can generally understand that the dentist is trying to help them. However, if a child at this age refuses to cooperate, it can be challenging to complete treatment without physically restraining them, which is not an option. If fear or phobia is the barrier to treatment, identifying the source of the anxiety is key. Many children at this age, who have had positive experiences in the past, may show a sudden change in behavior due to a recent negative event. By understanding the cause of the fear, we can address it and work with the child to overcome it. If cooperation remains an issue, sedation may be necessary to complete the treatment. If treatment isn’t urgent, we prefer to avoid sedation if possible, opting for multiple appointments or simpler procedures to help your child work through their fear.

8 and Up Children and teenagers in this group are often the most psychologically complex patients to treat. At around 8-9 years old, children have developed better coping skills, making routine dental visits more manageable. However, dental anxiety or phobias can still persist well into adulthood, and overcoming these fears can be a significant challenge. At this age, we aim to treat without sedation whenever possible, as this tends to have the most positive long-term effect. Successfully overcoming fear or phobia at this stage is a significant milestone for your child’s personal development and self-confidence.

As a parent, communication is crucial. It’s important to discuss the fear or anxiety your child is experiencing and help them understand that uncooperative behavior is not acceptable. While it can be frustrating when your child is resistant, setting clear expectations and consequences is key. For this age group, we strongly encourage attempting treatment without sedation, but in some cases, it may be necessary. Common sedation options for this age group include oral or IV sedation, depending on the complexity of the work required. Please refer to our Sedation section for more information on available sedation methods.

We are happy to discuss any concerns or preferences you may have during your consultation with Dr. Slonkosky. Consultation appointments provide an opportunity to address not only the specific treatment your child requires but also the best approach for managing their behavior and temperament during treatment.